Whilst going through a number of feelings, good and bad, is a given in our day-to-day life, it is important to understand we should allow ourselves to experience and learn from the feelings and not to get ‘stuck’ in it, particularly those in the negative category. Feelings are like an indicator such as an oil light coming on in our cars – it is a warning that something is not right, indicating we need  to do something to resolve it and move on (the oil light should not stay on!). However like drugs, feelings are somewhat strangely addictive for most. Yes, as bizarre as it may seem, even the negative feelings are addictive.

This brings me to the point of this blog, how do we resolve a feeling we don’t like and move on? Well I could go into many countless means from my training and experience, but today I wanted to share only one of my favourite resolutions “dissociation”. I love this method because it is easy and fun, and is extremely quick (only 5 minutes to de-stress… yes please!!!!)! Like the heading of this blog suggests and put simply, dissociation is a method of literally stepping out of a problem to change a feeling. I could go into all the technical ins and outs of explaining dissociation from an NLP practitioner’s perspective however from my past experience in a law firm, I am well aware that reading an abundance of information on a topic you’re not fully familiar with can initially be a little overwhelming or off-putting.

I have therefore created a dissociation exercise for you! This will give you the practical insight into the application of dissociation. All I ask now is that you please have fun experiencing and experimenting with one of my favourite ways to change a feeling.

DISSOCIATION INSTRUCTIONS

Recalling an Experience

• I want you to recall an experience that caused you some distress, frustration or sadness.
• As you remember it, make sure you are experiencing it as if it is actually happening right now – feel all the feelings and emotions, and see everything through your own eyes. Now pay particular attention to any sounds, which might include things said by someone significant or things said by you in that experience, and may even include your own self-talk.
• Now make a mental note of the degree of discomfort and pain this memory still causes to you (e.g. scale it).

Dissociation Process

• Now imagine or pretend you can step back out of that experience so you now see yourself there, as if watching this memory on a movie screen and stay focused on the screen.
• Push the entire screen far away from you, pushing it further and further away all the time, noticing that as it moves far into the distance the colours begin to fade and the detail diminishes substantially.
• Push it as far away as you can or need to push it, and notice the definite difference in the way you now feel about the events and memory.

NOTE: Unless you wish to strangely have the discomfort back, you can permanently leave the experience where you pushed it to AND you can even go so far as to blast the screen away and lose it in a blackhole!

I would be very delighted to hear from you about your experience with this exercise, so please leave a comment on this blog or Facebook.

Enjoy, and may you have an abundance of mind, body & soul health!

xx Chantelle xx